"What can I do to get girls to want to dance with me over and over again?"

This is not written by me, but it's what I do as well (except the smell nice part, kekek, maybe I should start using those perfume/cologne that Deffy gave me P). Earlier posts by me (e.g. ladder of moves) can help to achieve some of the points listed too.

VERY useful tips for all leads. Written by Jocelyn (Addicted2Salsa) in response to an email query.

Jocelyn's:

When it comes to what a follow likes in a lead, I think everyone is different. With that said, here's a few things that I prefer:

• Quality over quantity. I'd rather do the 6 moves you really know than the 26 you just learned and haven't worked on yet. In every song, I think it's fair to throw in a couple of new moves you're trying out, but I want the lead to make me feel comfortable and relaxed, and that means being sensitive to what you can and cannot smoothly lead.
• Be gentle, but clear. I like a lead that is firm enough to be understandable (no spaghetti arms), but not so stiff that I feel like I'm being dragged around. I think the job of the lead is to indicate what moves he wants and provide me some stability, direction and sometimes momentum, not to force me through the motions.
• I like a lead who tailors the dance to what I am capable of. Especially as a beginner and intermediate dancer, I always hated it when leads tried to get me through combo after combo that I was clearly having trouble with. Push me a little (I like a challenge), but don't make me feel bad about myself because I stumble through all your moves.
• Dress simply. Neat, clean is all I ask, and please make sure whatever you're wearing doesn't hit me (gold chains, jackets/blazers that flap around, wrist watch...)
• Smell nice. Deodorant and a small amount of cologne, if you want.
• Leave some time for shines/footwork. A whole song of combo after combo can be tiring - let me have a few 8-counts to show my stuff and interpret the music the way I want, plus you get a chance to think of some more moves.
• Smile! Hey, this is fun, right?

Be well,



Jocelyn (addicted2salsa co-host)

Link to original post from FB here

Different types of follows

When you start to social dance, u'll realize there are many many types of follows. As a good lead, one should be able to adapt to the follow to make her dance more enjoyable.

This is a general list (hopefully wont over generalize) but definitely not exhaustive:

1) Loves to shine
There are some follows that loves to shine. These usually belong to the highly skilled dancers who are not shy and are confident about their dancing. When u let them go, they dont want to stop :P (but sometimes, they dont stop coz they dont like you lead...... so u've gotta evaluate and reflect after your dance)

2) Hates to shine
Most beginner to intermediate follows hate to shine. It's because they seldom get to shine, haven't learnt it, not enough practice, not enough confidence, etc. etc. When u dance with this type of follow, if u let them shine, they'll give u the pleading look (or annoyed look) asking u to resume partner work.

3) fly all over the place
This can be due to several reasons. Some can't control their turn and direction. Some fly all over coz u threw them all over :P You challenge would to be hold them in check, control and make it easy for them to maintain their poise and position.

4) back lead
This often happens to follows who just started to learn how to lead. You can tell that their brain is not 'clear' and some often try to anticipate too much. As a result, they will back lead, giving too strong a feedback, or worse, force you into doing move u didn't intend to do. Such a type of follow also tend to be very heavy to lead. In general,.... don't try to fight them, u'll only waste your energy. You've gotta to very CLEAR and FIRM in your lead in order to control them. If they don't react as expected, just let them be (i.e. let them do what they want) and the dance will feel nicer and look better too.

5) ATAS (look down on you)
If you meet this kind of lead, don't be intimidated by them. Just do your own stuff, be confident and try to be as ATAS as them :P I've met follows who are like this and even made some excuse to leave the dance floor after only 3 counts of eight simply because they didn't think I could dance (I wasn't dressed like one and I'm kind of rounded in shape and I started with really simple moves). Well, it's their loss :P :P :P

6) Patient and laugh at every mistake
This is the '2nd best' kind of follow in my opinion. I was fortunate enough to meet quite a few who ALWAYS dragged me onto the dance floor whenever they see me. LOL, they were the ones who gave me the confidence to social dance after attending so many classes. They focus on having fun and enjoying the experience rather than stupid mistakes. You will always remember these follows. (why only 2nd best?)

7) Very tall girls (taller than you, with long long arms)
It's difficult to dance with such girls. Due to their height, it's very easy to hit their head. It's also difficult to spin or control them simply because you do not have the leverage. Their long arms also reduce the room for error in complex moves (but make certain moves easier, e.g. sexy titanic).

8) Those who gives very accurate and good feedback
Here comes the BEST follow in my opinion. They can know what went wrong with you execution of a turn pattern and often help you figure out the problem. These follows also can compensate for your mistakes and make you look good. Even when u throw them around, they usually can maintain their own balance. They are usually instructors :)

Shines (and Sabor)

Sabor means 'flavour'.
Why learn shines?

There are many good salsa songs that have sections which are simply not suitable for turn patterns. There will typically be parts where you "have to" do Afro Rhumba moves, or shines.

If course, u can still ignore it and do turn patterns, but it just doesn't feel right musically.

This is especially so when you've developed your dancing to be able to interpret the music and know what musicality is about.

Thus it is important to learn shines.

Beside the above, shine also gives Leads a VERY good way to improve their styling. Subconsciously, their body movement learnt from shines will creep into their posture, etc. when doing partnerwork. This will make them look a lot better when doing patterns!

Breaking in shines is also another level of leading, which goes beyond hand contact.... it's goes into play with music, visual contact with your partner, etc. Stuff which are really hard to describe with words, you simply gotta see it with your own eyes to understand.

If I can find a suitable video, I'll post here to illustrate this point.